Monday, October 27, 2003

early morning quiz.

What Irrational Number Are You?
You are φ

Of all the irrational numbers, you are considered to be the most beautiful. Those who know you well have called you by many names, all golden. However, most people don't know you by name and probably won't even recognize you by sight, but they do like to see you. Despite your pretty face, you are by no means shallow. You are involved it many things: finance, biology, architecture, art, music, and much more.

In some ways you and e are a nearly perfect match. The power and intensity of e excites you.

Your lucky number is approximately 1.61803399

Shiny Lemur
Straif's Blog

Friday, October 24, 2003

"i felt stagnation in the air." i'm not sure how true this statement is gramatically, but i sure feels that way right now. suddenly i found myself seeking for 'alternative' kind of readings that my reading diet has completely changed. Developing economies. ICT Business in developing countries. Sustainability. Innovation. Writing business plans.

Hmm.. if someone tells me i'd be doing all this around this time last year I am skeptical.. but here I am. Plunging right through.

Saturday, October 18, 2003

Had chinese dim sum for lunch with my sister today. Bad dim sum! alright.. so it wasn't thaaat bad. It was the 2nd worst dim sum i've ever had. The worst was in this little shop across beauty world. All the best dim sum meals i've had were in Indonesia. Somehow i felt over here, they have lost the 'art' of making dim sum. Or enjoying it, for that matter.

Speaking of dim sums, it brings up the topic of Chinese-ness. Yeah, Chinese-ness. I am Chinese by birth and that's where it stops. Yet, my way of life, my diet, my way of thought belies a very deep root. This is something I cannot deny. I have met many of my fellow Indonesians of Chinese heritage, who have completely lost that 'Chinese-ness' of theirs. It is disturbing; for what is lost has not been made up by a new identity. This group of people is growing in numbers as more Indonesian youngsters find it unnatural to retain any Chinese identity they had from birth.

What about me? I would argue that my loyalty, my heart, lies nowhere but in Indonesia. Yet the deep root cannot be unrooted. Nor do I want it to be. Chinese is what I am born as, what I am inside. But who I am to the world is for me to decide.

Thursday, October 09, 2003

What I realised today is that I'm not very verbose when my mind is troubled. Short, short post just to get it out of my system. Just realised also, that my comment feature wasn't displayed when i changed the layout template. Not that anyone posts any comment though since no one knows who is this neurotic publishing blogs :p

Tuesday, October 07, 2003

i never thought there'll be a day where i'll commiserate my heart out into a ... blog. Sigh.

Today i know how a rubber sheet must have felt when it is being stretched thin in all directions.. cos' being pulled in all directions is what i'm feeling right now. everybody demands something from me. everybody puts a deadline on me. i try to take comfort by thinking that, I harvest for God, and today the harvest is plenty!

Gosh, what wouldn't I give to just sit back and rest in the house where You dwell =)

But no, i won't give up just yet. Retreat for now, fight another day!
It's 2.30am, i'm still quite awake... very excited about learning how to write a business plan! Well, for you out there whose background is as technical as me (I'm an engineering student, by the way), there's hope yet!

Health-wise, not good. Not good at all, when you've been up working ovenight during the weekend, and suffering from various digestive ailment... =( It's late at night and i'm hungry. The smell of somebody's soup and toast wafted up to my room...

My project on Africa has finally been finalised! I'm writing a business plan for information technology venture in Africa. Since this is my first attempt doing something business-like, I'll start with industrial analysis and market research first, followed by (if i have time) a bigger business plan. Some useful sites on Africa's state of technology:
Acacia Initiative and Global Digital Divide Initiative

Sunday, October 05, 2003

I can't play this Song (David Gates)

Looking at your picture
Lying on my bed
Wishing I was holding close the real you instead
I dunno what I said or did but girl I'm missing you
And I'd like to hear my music
But there's nothing that I can listen to cos..

I can't play the songs I used to play because of you
The lonesome feeling starts before the intro's halfway through
Everyone reminds me of the things we used to do together
I can't go to places that I used to take you to
Cos everywhere the faces there they all look just like you
Until your heart comes back where it belongs...
I can't play this song

Everywhere I'm driving
I go a different way
I can't turn on my radio...afraid what they might play
My frens all drive me crazy cos you're all they ask about
And while I live in silence
But they just don't understand without you

I can't play the songs I used to play becos of you
The lonesome feeling starts before the intro's halfway through
No one can replace you cos once I tried and even when I
Try to go with someone new you're so deep in head
I look into her eyes but i say your name instead
Until your heart comes back where it belongs...
I can't play this song

There's nothing left I can do cos i'm so lost in love with you
No where to place to run
You know you're my only one

I can't play the songs you used to sing along with me
Cos everyone is always bringing back the memories
Until your heart comes back where it belongs...
I can't play this song

Thursday, October 02, 2003

This week is hectic. Truly hectic! Two sundays ago I was watching Wild Rice Theatre's production of "Animal Farm", and now it seemed like an eternity ago.. (doesn't make mathematical sense, I agree - but being mathematical is the last mode I am in right now..)

Apart from various midterms and assignments, there has also been tremendous development of ideas; especially concerning my idea of a startup company... for obvious reasons I will not put the idea here. Suffice to say that it keeps me burning at night while surviving through the endless stream of work being thrust onto us students :D

I'm experiencing a true writer's block. Ideas are brimming during classes and discussions; but somehow they refuse to 'congeal' into written, or anything remotely tangible. What am I to do, oh Africa? There's so much to think about Africa, so much to write, so much to do!