Saturday, December 03, 2005

My Second Holy Hour

Sometime ago, I mentioned chancing upon a Holy Hour when I intended to attend only the First Friday Mass, and had a wonderful time! Well last night is my 2nd holy hour throughout my life! (When was the last time you did something for the first time? Or the second time? :p)

Since my office has moved out of the NUS campus, the travel to Holy Cross Church took a while, and when I arrived, it was fifteen minutes into the Holy Hour. Apparently the program consists of 4 reflections on each week of Advent, and the format was: message by Fr. Richards, silent reflection, prayer and song, with all of us facing the Blessed Sacrament.

At this point, I'd like to say that I'm in the middle of an obvious crossroad, and this time I must absolutely make a choice of turning left or right. The Advent message thus hit home quite strongly, but there needs to be something from my part to digest it into something useful.

First message: missed out on this!

Second message: Peace

"Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, do I give unto you." John 14:27

This message speaks to me 3 things:
1. Peace is a gift,
2. Everlasting Peace is not to be found from the world,
3. Only from Christ and in Christ may I find peace.

Third message: Joy
Fr. Richards spoke of Joy as being distinct from happiness (I'm not sure they're that distinct; after all, we all strive for happiness in life, by which we probably meant joy), and that its source being found in doing the will of God. "For our heart is restless until it rests in Thee".

Fourth message: Love
Love must be the basis of our decisions when trying to discern God's will for us. Duh! But how do we know whether our decision is in the side of Love? If I'm choosing between keeping my current course and making a turn, how do I know in which does the path of Love lie? Perhaps the answer doesn't require rocket science, as Fr. Richards then said that one can simply see whether one's day is spent making others' lives better, more joyful.

So these three messages are knocking on my head.. but my denseness and distractions from the world still hampered my discernment process.

Is the desire to do God's will enough? What if it remains at mere desire and never actually realized? St Ignatius, you whose spiritual exercises helped countless souls unite themselves to God's will, pray for me.

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